A vast majority of the questions I receive begin the same way..."I know my (boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife...) is busy and I'm sure they love me, but..." and then they proceed to describe the lack of attention, love, and respect they are receiving from their partner. They have become so desensitized to mediocrity that they have become numb to the basic minimum standards people exhibit when they love and respect one another.
My current mission regarding dating, relationships, romance, sex and marriage is to encourage people to stop making excuses for their partner's lack of contribution and effort to their relationship. As human beings, we are often unaware that we are sending very strong messages to others. We may convey a message through the words we use and how we deliver them or by failing to express ourselves at a time when our words are wanted, needed or expected. We also expose our character and integrity through our actions or lack thereof. I believe in judging a person by their words and actions. Why? Because talk is cheap. Words dissipate - actions indicate.
If you find yourself making excuses for your partner's lack of effort on a daily basis, it is time for that to come to an end. Your partner does not deserve to occupy space in your heart until they appropriately occupy space in your life - by being an equal participant.
You are worth more than you are receiving and while it may be scary to take the steps necessary to regain your self-respect and self-esteem, your happiness is worth the price. I would encourage you to follow the words of my friend Cindy Brock when she says, "It is better to live five minutes of something great, than a lifetime of nothing special."
